Love Your Neighbor | Phase II

Missional engagement starts with a plan. In this first step, take some time to determine where you will intentionally engage. This focus area might be your neighborhood, workplace, favorite coffee shop, or any other gathering of people. Usually it works best to missionalize some things that you’re already doing. It is also helpful to determine how long you will focus on this particular space. Is this a 6 week sprint or a 6 month focus? While there is no standard duration for every focus, establishing a time period is helpful. Generally 3-6 months is the sweet spot. Finally, I would encourage you to think about when this missional engagement will take place in your week. You’re looking towards building consistent intentional rhythms of engagement.

Example: Sally has decided that she’s going to participate in LoveYourNeighbor by engaging her favorite coffee shop. She usually stops there about 3 times a week on her way to work. She decides that she’s going to be really intentional about engaging the coffee shop for the next 3 months and see how it goes. She’s determined to carve out an extra 10 minutes so that she can slow down & see people while she’s get her morning caffeine fix. Sally decides that at least twice a week she’ll go into the coffee shop instead of using the drive through.

You’re going to need to be a bit prepared if you’re going to do this well. Gospel conversations will certainly arise as you intentionally engage a particular place or people. The thought of having these conversations might make you a little nervous. That is perfectly normal. One way to push past the nerves and into obedience is preparation. There are plenty of great tools that will be helpful in sharing the gospel. Here are a few links to simple tools that are easy to learn and use.

3 circles

The Story

2 ways to live

One of the most helpful preparations for loving your neighbor is thinking through your own story. With a little bit of thought, you can get comfortable sharing your story of faith and restoration. Feel free to reach out to our staff if you’d like some help or some coaching in this area. Here is a link to get in touch with our Missions Pastor.

Example: Sally has settled on engaging her favorite coffee shop. Before she starts, Sally decides to dedicate a couple hours to learning the 3 circles framework for sharing the gospel. She’s heard people talk about 3 circles but hasn’t ever really looked at it herself. Sally is also committed to spending time in the word regularly. This Bible intake will help her be able to talk about the gospel in a personal way. She’s been a Christian for a few years now and is willing to talk about her story and how God has changed her life.

Let’s go! With a little bit of intentionality you’ll be a regular in no time. With some places that you’ll engage you’re already a regular…..neighborhood, workplace, favorite café, etc. The aim here is to be a regular on purpose. In order to LoveYourNeighbor like Jesus did you’re going to have to forsake that consumer mentality that we all have. Your engagement is about so much more than just a paycheck or coffee or your kids basketball experience. Your engagement is part of stepping into the mission of God locally. The next few steps will help you think through doing this well. However it starts with just showing up on purpose.

Example: Sally hit the coffee shop 3 times this week. She was purposeful about getting up a little early so that she wasn’t in a rush. She went inside twice and swung through the drive through once. She saw the same 3 employees each time she was there. She also noticed a mom with two small kids there 2 of the mornings.

Now that you’re intentionally engaged in the global mission of God there are a few little things that will help increase your effectiveness. The simplest of these things it o be friendly & kind. Remember, you’re pushing that consumer mentality aside and slowing down. This engagement is all about the people not the product. As you become a regular, be extra aware of the way you interact with those around you. Your kindness will be a welcome addition to whatever space you’re engaging.

Example: Sally was very aware of the people that were at the coffee shop during her morning visit. She took an extra step to say hello to the young mother there with her kids. She was purposefully polite to the barista and left a good tip. She didn’t know it at the time but that young mother was having a hard morning. A friendly conversation was such a welcome gesture.

One barrier to relational engagement is our forgetfulness. It can be really awkward to ask for someone’s name…especially if we’ve had a couple conversations with them. This is one area where we can really redeem some technology. Virtually all of us carry our phones with us everywhere. Create a note with the names or stories of the people you meet along the way. You’ll see a huge difference in the relational connection you have with people when you can call them by name. It goes a long way for you to ask about a particular situation or prayer request the next time to see someone.

Example: Sally has a running note in her phone for all the people she’s meeting at the coffee shop. Before she goes inside she scrolls through the note to remember the names of the employees and that young mom with two cute kids. She’s been praying for a door to open in deeper conversation with this little family.

This step is huge. Don’t miss the great significance of prayer in this missional engagement. Take time to pray before you step into your weekly rhythms of engagement. Pray while you’re sitting there waiting for something to happen. Pray for the people that you see all around you. Pray after you wrap up and are heading into the rest of your day.

Example: Sally has grown to love her engagement at the coffee shop. Before she gets out of the car to go in, she pulls out her notes and takes a minute to pray for the people she might see. She prays that God would help her to see people and not just coffee. She prays that God would open doors for gospel conversations and that He would use her in this coffee shop.

Here we go. In this step we go from being an intentional regular to having meaningful conversations. If the preparation made you nervous, this is where the rubber meets the road. Insider secret….everyone gets timid here. All you need is 10 seconds of courage. There will come a time when the conversation turns. You will have the opportunity to initiate or respond to spiritual conversation. If you are willing to be obedient here God will use you. This is where having a simple framework for the gospel will come in handy. It is also helpful to be willing to share some of your personal story of faith. The Holy Spirit works in the midst of our nervousness or shortcomings and uses us for His glory.

Example: Sally stopped by the coffee shop on her way to work. Immediately she recognized that something was off with the young mom she has befriended. After getting her coffee, sitting down for a second, and praying for a bit of courage, she got up and went over to the mom. She asked how her morning was going and the flood gates opened. After asking a few honest questions, Sally had the opportunity to give a few honest answers. She shared about her own story of brokenness and restoration and told of God’s great love for us. The ladies exchanged numbers and set a time to get together for more conversation. Sally asked if she could pray for the mom real quick before she had to go. What a morning!

“Reaching the World” can seem like a daunting task that isn’t for ordinary folks to participate in. This couldn’t be further from the truth. By bringing a friend into your regular rhythms of engagement you can help them understand what missional engagement really looks like. By taking someone along, you also help to make more relational connections that God can use.

Example: Sally has invited her friend Susan to join her for coffee one morning this week. Susan has heard Sally talk about how much she loves her mornings at the coffee shop. Sally introduces Susan to a couple employees and to another regular that she sees quite often. They have some good conversation with her favorite barista. After hearing more of the baristas story, Sally shows Susan how she keeps some notes and prays for people at coffee shop.

Inviting people into the things that are life-giving for you is one of the easiest ways to engage those around you. God has placed you in the midst of a wonderfully healthy church that provides so many ways to connect & grow. Don’t be shy about inviting people to come with you.

Example: God has used the church so much in Sally’s life. She gathers regularly to worship and study the word on Sunday morning. She loves her life group and has grown so much by doing life on purpose with other Christians. It is easy to invite someone into things that have been so good for her. This week she invited the young mom and the barista to join her at church. Because she’s been an intentional regular the invitation was easy to bring up and well received.

This is the sweet spot. Once you’re over the hump of becoming a regular in a new place and the nerves of having spiritual conversation with people, intentional engagement becomes deeply rewarding. It is incredible to think that God uses us in the midst of our regular rhythms and spaces.

Example: After just a couple weeks of intentional engagement, Sally began to settle in to a new way of viewing her coffee shop. Now she’s excited to see who is at the coffee shop each day and how God wants to use her in this specific place and group of people.